PASTA ON THE FLY – (CHAPTER THREE)

Most mothers know how to throw a pasta dish together without going to the store; I also know lots of students and singletons who are remarkably good at this as well.

It’s not just Vito’s contributions that have loaded up my pantry with every kind of pasta imaginable.  At the supermarket, I will often stop and wonder, “Hmm -- do I still have long pasta for Bolognese?”  I usually do, but just in case, I always grab a few packs.  I am also guilty of buying ridiculously expensive designer pasta whenever I spot some.  It’s so unusual; it’s so colourful.  I buy silly groceries at boutique prices when I’m travelling.  It’s my dirty little secret, sometimes with woeful results. 

Our son, Thomas, seems to have inherited this passion for stockpiling (those of us less prone to the use of euphemism might use the term ‘hoarding’), but with him it’s the real deal. Yup – if he sees pasta on sale while he’s grocery shopping, and the sign says ‘STORE BRAND PASTA 4/$5” – he’s in.  The last time I visited him in Toronto, I checked out his pantry, of course.  He had TWENTY-EIGHT bags of pasta. No lie.  I counted them.  He had spaghetti, linguini, macaroni and many other willy-nilly shapes and sizes of pasta.  Shells, bowties and I’m pretty sure Vito has been supplying him as well. Thomas is a man who lives alone in Cabbagetown and doesn’t cook too, too much. Thanks to me, however, and to his own imagination, he knows how to throw a ‘Pasta on the Fly’ meal together. No problem.  This first recipe, however, is one that we use to make together when he was very little.


Oodles of Noodles

When Thomas was small, he liked all the different sizes and shapes of noodles.  This is a quarantine goodie, because you’ll get rid of bits and ends of dried noodle bags. 

  • 2 cups whatever bits of noodles you have (I used curly, macaroni, shells and dente di leone)*
  • 1 liter of whatever pasta sauce you had in your freezer --  defrosted 
  • 1 bag of shredded cheese (or the equivalent)
  • Béchamel sauce -- this is the easiest of all the sauces.  If you don’t know how to make it, look it up.  Three ingredients and then S&P.  Alternatively use one of those envelopes you have in the pantry -- hollandaise works too.

  1. Cook the noodles (do this before you do the rest) in lightly salted water, then drain and set aside.
  2. Find a casserole pan and don’t oil it, just slop some meat sauce and then cover it with the cooked noodles.
  3. Pour a little béchamel over top and sprinkle with cheese.
  4. Slop some more meat sauce and more noodles.
  5. Pour the rest of the béchamel and cover that with a handful of cheese.
  6. Put all of the rest of the meat sauce and cheese.
  7. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes or until it’s bubbling.

*Dente de leone pasta is amazing because it holds the sauce so well.


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Fasta Pasta

I’ve been working in the food industry all my life.  I have people dropping into my house ALL THE TIME. They come by to say ‘hi’ and have a beer and then BA-BAM – the cheese and crackers are not enough, suddenly they have a game to watch and dinner is needed.

This is my go-to meal for a crowd but (sigh) we’re making it for two. It’s yummy, and don’t worry if it’s goopy – that’s the way it should be.

  • 4 slices of bacon chopped and sizzled in a pan
  • Linguini 
  • 1 small onion diced
  • 2 cloves garlic minced
  • 1 egg
  • 2 cups grated cheese
  1. Boil the linguini for 7 minutes and let it sit in a sieve.
  2. Sauté the onion in a pan and then add garlic.
  3. Add the bacon and make sure there is enough oil.
  4. Add pasta and stir well.
  5. Add egg and swish.
  6. Add cheese and stir well and quickly.

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My friend, Diane, called me the other day.  She had just returned from Florida and so was in isolation with her husband, Doug (no – their children’s names are not Debbie and Daryl). She was wondering if I could drop off a couple of soups to flesh out her menus for the next few days.  As usual, when someone calls me these days, I keep them on the phone for a while to catch up, whether they like it or not.  I told her about this cookbook project, and that I was only cooking with food already in my house.  She told me she was getting quite inventive as well, since she was also avoiding grocery stores. We laughed and I said, “What do I do with a giant jar of artichoke hearts?”

PHOTO

“Oh”, she replied.  “I had one of those and I made pasta with it.”  That got me thinking.  Surely (stop calling me Shirley!) you remember the hot, cheesy artichoke dip that was very popular in the 80s? My husband, Stephen, went to prep school in upstate N.Y., after he was thrown out of every high school in Canada and even a few in the States.  He made great friends at Northwood, and they’re always having reunions. 

At one of these events, we were invited to the headmaster’s house.  His wife was named Linda, and she was this social butterflying angel; so kind and lovely.  A tennis-playing, energetic force who welcomed us into her house. Linda made so many snacks and nibbles -- it was an extravaganza.  I was vegetarian at the time, so cocktail weenies and pâté were not an option.  I hate eggs, and since it was the 80s, you can be sure that devilled eggs and mini-quiches figured prominently.  She brought out this fragrant, mouth-watering, sizzling dish and asked me (one of the only other women in the room) to try it.  I reluctantly told her that I was vegetarian, but she told me to go for it.

YUMMY!

“What is it?” I begged.  She told me to wait and came back with a few minutes later with a recipe index card.

Artichoke Dip

  • 1 jar artichoke hearts
  • 1 cup mayonnaise
  • 1 cup shredded cheese

  1. Dump all ingredients into a blender and buzz it.
  2. Dump result into a baking pan and bake at 350 until bubbling.

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Pasta à La Artichoke Dip

How do I turn artichoke dip into a meal that my carnivorous husband will eat?

BACON – bacon is almost always the answer.

Fry or bake 6-8 slices of bacon.

Find some pasta (I used cavatappi, which is also known as spiralli).  I have some in my pantry, because, as you know, Vito (my exiled and isolated harmonica playing friend) gave me a bag of it before he left for Puglia. You can use any short pasta.

Boil it for 7 minutes.

Mix all the pasta and unbaked artichoke mixture and dump it in a casserole dish.

Chop up the bacon and sprinkle it on the top.

Bake at 350 until it’s sizzling.

Delicious dinner.

Thanks, Diane – you inspired me!

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